The Crazies Among Us
Oh my gosh you guys, PEOPLE.BE.CRAZY.
Even though I really, seriously, already knew that people were crazy (I do read the comment sections on most articles), two encounters that happened to me recently IRL (in real life, for those that aren’t “in the know” about cool lingo) have really hit this point home. In order to counteract the craziness that I am about to tell you about, I will add cute pictures of FVB throughout the post. Here’s the first one:
ENCOUNTER #1: I’m in line at the dollar store the other day, and there is an older woman in front of me. She of course is very interested in FVB (who isn’t?) and starts asking me all the usual questions: what’s his name? How old is he? Was he delivered vaginally? Wait, what?
Backing up…… she was commenting on the size of his head (which is large). I told her that he’s in the 77 percentile for head size and she sort of grimaced, then whispered her question containing the word vaginally. I mean, what would you do? Answer? Not answer? Laugh in shock? I think that I did a combo of laughing in shock and answering, plus also making the obvious statement that his head wasn’t its current size when he was born. Now if that wasn’t awkward enough, she then proceeds to tell me that her daughter-in-law recently had a baby but the baby was born “the other way.” She said this in sort of a conspiratorial tone (I had to look up how to spell that word, BTW), with her hand over one side of her mouth, in a bit of a whisper. Hmmmm. The other way? Like, the baby came out of her mouth? Or the baby was born via C-section? (C-section seems much more likely). I sort of smiled, not sure what to say next and hoping she would finish checking out, while she continued on by giving me the baby’s stats. Somehow it came back around to the baby’s birth and the strange “other way” comment that she made. Apparently the baby was “flipped,” which I took to mean breach, i.e. feet first. Now why would she not just say breach???? And why is it a secret??? Thankfully at this point her items were bagged and even the cashier was giving her a strange look, so off she went.
ENCOUNTER #2: I’m on the light rail with hubs and FVB, heading home after a fun afternoon downtown. FVB is nursing (weird) and pretty much asleep. On the light rail, much like regular trains, there are bench seats that face each other, so that when you ride you can face either way, like a booth in a restaurant. I am facing the door of the train car and hubs is sitting opposite me. The door opens, and a family boards (mom, dad, two kids). The mom looks at me and basically panics, quickly hustling her kids to ensure that they sit facing the same direction as me, which is opposite of how they want to sit. She is literally pushing them into the seats and hissing at them to turn around (away from me). Her husband, pretty oblivious, is trying to understand what the big deal is and I hear she say (in the same hiss whisper): “She’s nursing” in the same tone that you would say “She’s smoking crack” or “She’s decapitating those kittens.” The kids, naturally now EXTREMELY curious, keep trying to turn around and want to know (legitimately) why they can’t. She, of course, can’t tell them, so she just hiss whispers, “I’ll tell you later.”
Now, let’s be serious for a second. When a woman is nursing a baby, there really isn’t much to see besides the back of the baby’s head and the upper half of the woman’s chest. You see more when a woman is wearing a low-cut top. Unless you are close to the woman, concentrating your gaze directly on her breast, and happen to be watching at the very moment that the baby is either latching or de-latching, you have a pretty low chance of seeing a nipple. Which I’m assuming is the offensive part, because in bathing suits, low cut tops, etc, you see almost every other part of the breast and apparently no one is offended by that. So it must be the nipple. Anyway, I won’t go on a tangent about the stupidity of people who are offended by breast feeing in public. It’s too stupid. I will say, though, that people are seriously messing up their kids if this is how they teach them to react to a woman nursing her baby in public. I had to SERIOUSLY bite my tongue to keep from just explaining to the kids what I was doing (in one sentence, very naturally, “I’m feeding my baby”). It’s not a hard concept, it’s natural, and IT’S WHAT BREASTS ARE MADE FOR. OK, sorry, I wasn’t going to go on a tangent.
I think all of those pictures did the trick. Just inserting them into the post made me smile and NOT get re-worked up over the crazies in the world. I hope you enjoyed them, too!
So much yummy food to discuss, but not enough time! I made vegan “moxerella” for our pizza last week and IT WAS INCREDIBLE and super easy. I will tell you about it next time. I’m using it for grilled cheese tonight to go with our vegetable soup, so next post I can show you the pizza AND the grilled cheese and you can be doubly impressed. Until then, stay safe out there- I know the crazies aren’t just in Denver!