This weekend was bittersweet. We spent most of it at Farm Sanctuary, which was amazing. More on that to come. We came home to discover that our sweet old pug Cassidy had died. She had been in a steady decline for most of the year, so we knew that her time was coming. Hubs found her in her crate, where she had been spending the majority of her time for the last 6 months or so. She looked like she was sleeping, and we imagine that she probably had been when she took her last breath. She was a sweet old girl that lived a long 13 years, 8 of which I was lucky to be a part of. She was always the sweetest dog, and adjusted beautifully to FVB’s arrival. He always enjoyed interacting with her, although their interactions had diminished as her health declined. Right now he seems more concerned about where her crate is, but he is 2 after all and does not really understand of the concept of death. When he asked where her crate was, I told him that Cassidy had died and she wouldn’t need her crate anymore. He asked “Why died?” and I explained that her body had gotten old and tired, and stopped working, so she died. He asked again, “Why died?” and I repeated my answer. He quickly moved on to something else. His time with Cassidy in the last 6 months or so has been pretty limited, so I imagine that we won’t hear too much else from him about her. It is sad, in a way, that he won’t remember her, but it is also easier for us. Dealing with grief and sadness as a grown up is tricky enough, without having to also manage the sadness of your child!
We buried Cassidy in the backyard and have plans for a few memorial items to put there. FVB enthusiastically helped dig the hole, although we did not explain what we were digging it for. Hubs and I laid her in it while FVB was busy playing with his KK and Poppi, I think seeing her body go into the ground would be much too confusing for his 2 year old brain. I’m all for truth and transparency, but I think he would be traumatized by seeing her buried (I mean, it was sort of traumatizing for the adults, let’s be honest). We ordered a personalized garden flag with her picture on it, a cute pug statue with a solar light, and FVB and I are going to paint a garden stone to lay here. Maybe in the spring we can plant a few flowers there as well (we dug a deep hole, and laid a board on top of it so that we wouldn’t accidentally dig her up when planting flowers…imagine the trauma of that!). I think FVB will enjoy seeing her face there and will love the pug statue. It will be a nice way to keep her memory with us.
In Memory of Cassidy, 2003-2016. We will miss you, little girl!